Posted 13 hours ago

rexuality:

me: wow this is fucked up
vagina: idk it’s kinda hot :|
me: vagina no
vagina:  ( ͡ ° ͜ʖ ͡° )

Posted 13 hours ago

buttkeyk:

aleatoryw:

justsomecrazydreamer:

Glamour finally speaking my language

FICS BEFORE DICKS

One time I showed this guy my fanfiction and he said it was great

Posted 13 hours ago

One of the first things they ask you in the ER is to rate your pain on a scale from 1 to 10. I’ve been asked this question hundreds of times and I remember once, when I couldn’t catch my breath and I felt like my chest was on fire, the nurse asked me to rate the pain. Though I couldn’t speak, I held up 9 fingers. Later, when I started feeling better, the nurse came in and she called me a fighter. “You know how I know?” she said, “You called a 10 a 9.” But that wasn’t the truth.

I didn’t call it a 9 because I was brave. The reason I called it a 9 was because I was saving my 10…and this was it. 

(Source: linseymorris)

Posted 13 hours ago

purr-purrr:

My pussy is winking at chu suckas

Posted 13 hours ago
Posted 13 hours ago

telapathetic:

*breaks leg* but..are my eyebrows okay?

(Source: telapathetic)

Posted 13 hours ago

thegreatnarwhalsmuffin:

schmergo:

A Harry Potter AU where everything’s exactly the same, except the house elves look like Lord of the Rings elves and Dobby’s, like, played by Orlando Bloom. But they’re still not allowed to have clothes

orlando bloom hitting himself in the face with a lamp

Posted 13 hours ago
Posted 13 hours ago
narcotic:

There’s gonna be a day where I see this and don’t reblog it but that is not today

narcotic:

There’s gonna be a day where I see this and don’t reblog it but that is not today

(Source: lettres-a-paris)

Posted 13 hours ago